When Marrying My Girlfriend Feels Like Becoming Her Family’s ATM
I’m Lekan, an MC and event planner earning ₦300k–₦500k monthly in Akure. I met my girlfriend, Nimi, at a wedding in 2024. She was helping cater the event, and I was hosting. Amid a parking lot commotion, I noticed how level-headed she was and sparked a conversation. We hit it off, started dating over the phone and soon met in person for home-cooked meals. Our first year had growing pains. Nimi is an introvert; I’m an extrovert with lots of female friends. We argued, even briefly broke up, before learning to set boundaries. Then came money clashes. Nimi works hard in catering, makeup and photography but gives almost all her earnings to her widowed mum and siblings. I didn’t understand why she never said no. Now we’re planning to marry, but Nimi’s family treats me like an ATM. Her sister and brother ask for cash gifts. When I visited her mum, I replaced her broken charger. Requests come monthly, and I worry that after marriage I’ll be stuck footing every bill. We agree in principle on pooling resources, but I fear I’ll end up as sole breadwinner for her whole family. I’d love to hear how others handle in-law money requests and keep financial balance in marriage.
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